In My Dreams, In My Wake

There was a time some time ago
When every sunrise meant a sunny day, oh a sunny day
But now when the morning light shines in
It only disturbs the dreamland where I lay, oh where I lay
I used to thank the lord when I'd wake
For life and love and the golden sky above me
But now I pray the stars will go on shining,
you see in my dreams you love me

Daybreak is a joyful time
Just listen to the songbird harmonies, oh the harmonies
But I wish the dawn would never come
I wish there was silence in the trees, oh the trees
If only I could stay asleep,
at least I could pretend you're thinking of me
cause nighttime is the one time I am happy

You see in my dreams

We climb and climb and at the top we fly
Let the world go on below us, we are lost in time
And I dont know really what it means
All I know is that you love me, in my dreams
I keep hoping one day I'll awaken,
and somehow she'll be lying by my side
And as I wonder if the dawn is really breaking
She touches me and suddenly I'm alive


A song by REO Speedwagon that I loved, and still do, for the many reflections of my personal life's.

I am fading. Like the dreams in every waking moment. I hide, like the child who loves to hug his mother, yet fears her frequent ire for his precocity.

For what is true togetherness? I have no answer. When we humanly fail in our inabilities to see the differences that make two people truly become one. That one should fade and become the other? Or that two should draw upon and feed upon the other's love, differences and strengths?

Or are we looking only for our own reflections?

That in moments of darkness,
you seek the sun and its light.
That in sunshine,
you soon wilt and despise its heat.
Seeking its very essence and yet,
you do not really want what it gives.

Seeking the wind for its breezy comfort,
yet cursing it for the dust and tears in your eyes
it also carries in its wake.

What are we truly looking for?

I am fading. I am a face without true meaning.
I am the moon, whose light is not my own.
A dark soul, lifeless and dead giving naught
but reflections of what people want to see.

There is no me, for I can only be,
When the world does not see.

There I Be

When you hear the breeze, its me whispering...
When you feel a warmth enveloping you, its me loving you...
When you're cold, its me missing you...
When your fingers brush your lips, its me wishing...
And when I flicker through your mind, its me...
thinking, dreaming and waiting... dying

for you. Always.

True Happiness

Have you heard of the 17th-century theologian Samuel Rutherford? Perhaps it’s time to resurrect his faith-inspiring memory.

Rutherford, a member of the council that wrote the Westminster Confession, was imprisoned because of his beliefs. While in prison, he wrote this soul-strengthening letter expressing the joy that sustained him through his trials: “If God had told me some time ago that He was about to make me as happy as I could be in this world, and then had told me that He should begin by crippling me in all my limbs, and removing me from all my usual sources of enjoyment, I should have thought it a very strange mode of accomplishing His purpose. And yet, how is His wisdom manifest even in this! For if you should see a man shut up in a closed room, idolizing a set of lamps and rejoicing in their light, and you wished to make him truly happy, you would begin by blowing out all his lamps; and then throw open the shutters to let in the light of heaven.”

When the candles that light up our darkness are blown out, let’s rejoice that God is throwing open shuttered windows and pouring in the sunshine of His love.

Pitch Black

And then the ray of light fades.
I fall, kicking and flailing,
clinging on to illusions
and holding onto nothing.

Never place your hopes on anyone. For they can and will drop you along with all the empty words once spoken into the void, leaving hollow sights and sounds in old familiar places.